New Scholarship Foundation Set Up to Support Upper-Middle Class White Suburbanites

A new, first of its kind, national scholarship foundation has been established to help upper-middle class white suburbanites pay for college and become a top tier citizen.

For years, members of a highly discriminated against class have had to pay for their own college tuitions solely from their parents’ salaries.  Other economically propelled groups like African-Americans, Latinos, or members of the LGBT Community have simply been handed money for being a certain skin color.  Whites have been refused money for lacking skin pigmentation.

The newly formed group BLACS (Bringing Light Across Caucasian Survival), created mainly by the parents of these whites, focuses on awarding anywhere from $2,500 to $25,000,000 to overprivileged white children for their bachelor’s degrees in something like sculpting, screenwriting, or leisure studies.  With that money and education they can fulfill their parents’ dreams of their children achieving less on their own and more as an extension of someone else’s success.  So far the NAACP, multiple gay rights organizations, and the ACLU have all given BLACS free advertisement, a sign that the organization has been well received.  Of course the advertisement is in the form of multiple class action suits.  But hey, any press is good press right?