February 25, 2012 Leave a comment
This past week, the White House announced that the women on the front lines will be receiving a much needed makeover.
Up until recently, women were not allowed to serve on the front lines of combat because of archaic feelings about what women are capable of. The women in the military of changed the minds of our nation’s leaders and have shown they are tough enough to serve on the front lines. But they surely can’t go to war in a very dangerous area looking all drab and yucky now can they!
Which is why the White House’s next course of action is to set up a new committee: Keeping Our Frontline Women Pretty. Since women are now truly equal in the military, we need to make sure they are always looking their best. That is the truly important issue. And we all know that when a woman says she is mad about the dishes, she is really mad you did not compliment her new haircut. Many think their attempts to get on the front lines were really just a complaint about their ugly outfits.
No one is sure who will design the new outfits. Many in Congress have thrown around the names Ed Hardy and Von Dutch because they heard “those are the cool designers.” When most Congressmen were asked what material the new outfits would be and both wool and silk were thrown out, though nothing is set in stone. “Ask my wife. She’s the boss,” said Ohio Congressman Dennis Kucinich.
We here at Rawful News are super duper excited to see what those old men can come up with for these beautiful and strong women.